The Island with Bear Grylls: are modern men weak?

I love Bear Grylls. Did you know he is a hard-core Christian? That’s not why I love him but I thought I would mention that upfront because when I tell people that, they don’t believe me. Personally, I am not very religious, but you know that I love to bang on about spirituality all the time on this blog.

But today I want to talk about survival.

I have a cushy, comfy life. Every night I go to sleep on a comfy mattress surrounded by poofy pillows. I live in a temperate climate and I enjoy generally good health and access to packaged food at reasonable prices. When I turn on the tap (or faucet) water comes out. If I twist the left one, hot water comes out. It’s a good life. Nice men even come daily and collect my rubbish for me, and all the government wants from me is about 40% of my total net worth – hey – nothing is perfect, right?

Could you survive in the wild? Have you ever thought about it?

Since a young age, I have been fascinated by stories of those who have had to survive with next to nothing. I love shipwreck stories, “lost in the wild” stories and “raised by wolves” stories. I have read them all.

Bear Grylls teaches British men how to survive

One of my new favourite shows on TV is The Island with Bear Grylls. According to Bear “modern men are in crisis” and I couldn’t agree more. The concept of the show is to leave a bunch of British men on an island to fend for themselves.

From Wikipedia: “Thirteen British men were taken to a remote, uninhabited Pacific island by Bear Grylls for a month where they were left completely alone, filming themselves, and with only the clothes they were wearing and some basic tools. Their initial priorities were to find a fresh water source and food to feed themselves.”

Are modern men weak?

Bear tends to think that the modern man is a bit of a pansy. It’s true. I live in Australia where most of the manly men still reside – by Sydney, the gorgeous city I live in has its fair share of pansies, wankers, hipsters and woosy-pants. Luckily for me, I am dating a very manly man. He’ll put his hand on a dirty window sill without even thinking about it, just to point at a funny dog across the road. Gorgeous.

But these British men on the island! I have almost been banned from watching the show because I yell at the TV so much – I get all feisty. Really – what a pack of woosie-pants! Half of them spend all day lazing about instead of working on their shelters and things. One of them built a hat rack (I kid you not) before building himself a platform as a bed to fend off the creepy crawlies below. Madness!

Could you start a fire?

In another episode the men were trying to start a fire with a beam, string and (eventually) kindling. They had been at it for over 8 hours before they managed to get a spark. In the blazing sunlight and heat.

And one of the men was wearing glasses – and they didn’t even think to use the lens as a prism to try to refract the light to make a spark. I’m not sure if it would work in practice, but by God, I would have given it a go after 8 hours of no success with the other method. I have read Lord of the Rings – didn’t they?

Doomsday Preppers – the TV show

I would like to try my hand at surviving one day – and I also like that TV show Doomsday Preppers where they interview people preparing for the end of the world. I don’t really think the world will end within my lifetime – but you never really know.

So – let’s go through this one more time, shall we?

1. Make sure you’re safe from all threats

2. If bad weather (hot or cold) shelter is a priority

3. Next priority is water

4. If you can’t see any, climb to a high place to check your surroundings

5. Next – look for food – you can last several weeks without much food but you will start to suffer after 3 days

Right-o. There we go.