My Partner is Leaving Me, But I’m OK: Monster Moon in Libra
The coming Monster Moon in Libra means that I have to write a personal post today because my feelings are consuming me. My partner is about to leave me, but that’s OK.
You heard me. I said, that’s OK. It’s OK.
I swear to god, it’s OK and I’m fine.
No really.
You may not know, but there is a Monster Moon in Libra next week, on March 27th. My partner and I are both Librans, and he is moving out tomorrow after being together for two years. Each day this week he has been removing items of furniture from the house, taking one piece at a time, leaving another hole in my apartment, another hole in my life. It has been so awful and tortuous I am having a hard time coping.
But it’s a good thing.
There is a Monster Moon next week
I have decided that I need to move on from this relationship and next week’s Monster Moon in Libra is making sure that this is happening.
Yes, it’s a story that you’ve heard all too often these days. I have to move on because I have decided that this relationship is not going anywhere. It’s the same old chestnut. I am 34 and my partner is 48. I want us to get married and have kids and buy a house. He wants to be a rock star. Yes, I’m serious.
To be clear here, my partner is the most wonderful, talented musician, and he has had some taste of fame before, and he has been in professional bands and has been a salaried musician. But this post is not about him. He is not my problem. I am my problem. It is not his fault that I want to have a baby and he doesn’t. He should have no obligation to provide me with something I alone desire.
Having a Baby is not a transaction
Not that it’s a typical transaction. Not that it’s something you can discuss like buying a car or a house. The truth is, we are not stable enough as a couple to make this happen, and he is right to refuse my pleads, my requests, my dreams/demands depending on who you ask. I can’t make him want this. All I can do is be true to what I want and be brave.
Astrologer Susan Miller says that it is the Monster Moon in Libra making me push for these changes now. “If I had a dollar for every girl who told me that they stayed in a relationship, 6, 8 10 years hoping that the proposal would come. So sometimes you have to create a situation where you say, “I’m going to leave if this is not going to lead somewhere.” If it’s important to you. Not everybody wants to get married. Not everybody wants to have children, but some do.”
In my home, this move feels sudden, but it has been brewing for a long time: Miller says, “These hard aspects kind of wake us up to it sooner. But the universe wants us to be productive. I see it over and over…that our time on Earth has to count for something.”
Hard Astrological Aspects make us make Tough Choices
Hard aspects making me move on? When I read that this morning, I nearly fell off my chair! This is exactly what I am going through. I am quite beside myself. I still love my partner, I love his so much. I am totally crazy about him. But he does not want what I want. He says he does, but in a roundabout, “Yeah, I’ll get there one day” sort of way. His nonchalance with his life and goals drives me crazy.
I am beside myself that he is leaving. And he is leaving because I tell him to, repeatedly. My heart knows that I will not get what I desire from this relationship. Susan Miller seems to feel the same way. She says she sees it all the time. “I was thinking about love and looking closely at people around me. And sometimes the answer about love is driven by our behaviour, not the other person’s behaviour. And it’s totally unconscious. And you can see it – you can see it around you. That people are sending the message out that I don’t really want this relationship. And yet they’re hurt when the person leaves.”
And my boyfriend is leaving me!
Why am I so hurt that he is leaving? Isn’t this what I have been asking for?
“So we first have to square off our own intentions, our own expectations. And be clear to ourselves about what we hope will happen. And if it doesn’t, have the courage to keep moving on.”
Another astrologer Urban Soul Flower comments here on the Monster Moon: “Full Moons symbolize opposition. The opposite of Aries is Libra. The lesson here is us (Libra) Vs. me (Aries) Relationships may be challenging during this time as we figure out where people play a role in our lives, and if we want them sticking around. these relationships can be professional or personal. The Asteroid Ceres is at 0 degrees Cancer touching the t-Square involving the Sun in Libra, Pluto in Capricorn and the Sun/Uranus in Aries. Ceres is associated with nurturing, self-worth as well as issues of abandonment.”
Please, if are reading this, say a little payer for me and my partner and wish us both the best in this difficult time. All I want is for him to be happy and safe and I want the best for both of us. It’s so very hard and all these emotions get in the way of my better judgement.
“Why Am I so scared of losing you when you are not even mine?”
Author: Anonymous
I’m truly sorry to hear that you are going through this. You sound like you are handling it well. Having a baby is a huge decision and one that my husband and I do not see eye to eye on. I worry that it will really tear us apart. You will find someone one day that wants a baby as much as you…and in that moment you will realize that all of the pain you are experiencing right now was worth it. Hang in there! <3
thank you so much for your kind words. I am feeling a little upset today. I feel like this is actually the end. Part of me wants to beg him to stay. Do you have children? I’m guessing you don’t want to but your husband does? is that hard?
Everything will be okay. It’s hard when 2 people want the complete opposite but at least you guys aren’t falling apart because a baby is already here. That’s the only positive thing I can think of and even that doesn’t sound too nice. I hope you get what I mean though. Everything has a way of working out in the end. Don’t be too sad though. Think positive thoughts =(
Thank you! It’s been tough but we are trying to be respectful and sensible! Ill keep you posted!
Stay strong doll! I am divorcing for the exact reason. I want babies and my husband even though he said he definitely wanted them changed his mind after we got married. We will find good men who want families and we will look back at these extremely trying times and shake our heads thanking the gods we came through and prospered. Stay strong!! And even though i dont know you i am sending you light and love and a giant hug!!
Thank you so very much Candice! Well I guess these are universal, timeless problems. We are not the first women to go through this, and at least we can now move on from situations where we were not able to realise our dreams for the future. I appreciate your kind words so much, and I will be thinking of you too. Both going through the same thing – but time heals all wounds. Be strong. Be brave.
Alyce, it’s Farnarcler here. I left you a reply on my blog, but in case you haven’t returned, here are my thoughts……and I can write a little more here than I can on my own blog because I don’t want to reveal too much there about the poem you loved.
You’re a brave woman, because it’s so hard to leave someone you love. And when it comes to a choice about having children – well that’s just the biggest sacrifice you can make for someone if it is something you really want. Can I say that he probably isn’t the last man you will love, and being a mother is the most challenging but wonderful journey a woman can make. So use those awesome writing skills and write yourself a killer online dating profile – get back out there (when you are ready) and seek out your dream. I’ve met some gorgeous American men through online dating (when I’ve headed your way for a holiday).
And as for my poem……..well it was all real. It’s hard when you give your heart to someone who cares, but not enough. Whether the monster moon was the catalyst for my cold ending of it, or whether I had just hit the wall, it matters not. I’ve done it now and I’m slowly moving on.
Bxx
Thanks so much for your words. I was totally floored by the events of the last few days. I am in an immense ammount of pain but all I can do is continue on. I knew in my heart of hearts that this man was not the one for me, and that he just didn’t want the same things. It was so hard to let go.
PS. My latest post, ‘Unrequited’, is about the same person. I think you’ll be able to relate to that too.
Thanks ! I will check it out! and I will stay in touch!
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Thank you for sharing your story! Me and my Boyfriend broke up during a Full Moon (Eclipse) a few years back. We have a five year old daughter together. I felt like the world was coming to an end, but It all worked out for the best. Astrological events like this may be painful, but they remove all the things we think we need from our lives in order for us to move on a build anew. On the 10th of April, there will be a New Moon in Aries! New Moon’s are the perfect time to plant new seeds and make wishes. I wish you all the best of luck! 🙂
Thank you for your comments! Yes, when a relationship ends, it can truly feel like the end of the world. That’s how this felt for me. I am so glad that the changes that happened for you turned out to be positive in the end. That gives me hope. I will also check out information on the new moon in Aries. Thanks for taking the time to share.
A
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