I have had some really awesome things happen to me lately – and then I have also had some really bad things happen to me. What counts as a bad thing? I’m OK but what happened to me definitely counts. I feel quite sad inside and like I have suffered quite a bit – needlessly. I feel like a big idiot, really. Like I’ve been banging my head against a bloody brick wall.
There have been many times in my life where I feel I am repeating the same mistakes. Often it will take me several goes at something to get it right. But you know what? When I look back on things – I see the firm results of change.
I have grown and matured – but not fast enough some times. Right now my heart carries a heavy sadness and I feel pain every day. More so than that, I feel confused and hurt – and that’s just life, I suppose.
I have blogged so much about sadness and pain I am sure you are sick of it by now. Truth is, I feel things so deeply and my physical body aches from the pain I feel inside. It’s crushing, destructive and suffocating. It’s hard to breathe.
There are lots of bad things that happen to women. Here are some of the worst:
Luckily for me, there are quite a few sites that deal with what the “worst things” that can happen to people are. I’ll just focus on women today, because here in Australia it is Equal Pay Day.
Yep, this pops up frequently on the list. Thank god this has never happened to me, but it has happened to women I know and close friends of mine. Most women are raped by someone they know. This is despicable.
Going to jail for life
No one wants to go to jail for their whole life. According to Wikipedia, there are currently 4 women serving life sentences in Australia. One is “cannibalistic husband killer Katherine Knight”. I had an ex-boyfriend who met her, or sort of knew her. Katherine Knight was an abattoir worker who sliced up her partner, and cooked part of him. A guy I dated was an air-conditioner maintenance man in a NSW correctional facility. He used to talk to her every day. Weird.
Losing a child
Lots of sites also suggest that this is the worst thing that could ever happen to a person. This gets my vote 100%. If this has happened to you or anyone you know, I wish you love from the bottom of my heart.
Sigh. It sounds naff and shallow – but there are many people who believe that this is the worst thing that can happen to a woman. I’m not fat, thank god, but I have been and I can tell you – it is awful. Should it be included in a list where I have also put rape and losing a child? Yes. Obesity is a modern misery. Obese people carry pain with them every minute of every day. Obesity is killing out children and running our lives.
To lose my humanity and free will
What a beautiful thing to say. Big Cherry Bomb wrote that as a comment on this post here. I am not afraid of losing my humanity and I am not 100% sure about how much free will I have – but these are searching questions that I will continue to ponder, gratefully.
Other things that didn’t make the list
Getting a disability
I used to fear this, but after working in the disability employment sector, I no longer fear it. And you know what? Most people gain disabilities later in life through simple old age when we lose our hearing, vision and mobility. Do not fear disability – it’s a fact of life.
Being in a permanent vegetable state
Lots of sites suggested that. While it wouldn’t be ideal – would I really know or care? They often joke that dementia is only bad for the people around you.
It’s OK to be unhappy. Often our times of greatest reflection come when times are tough. We learn so much through our hardships and I can say that when there is rain, there is growth.
Now let’s cheer up a bit
But hey, bad shit happens every day. Look at this amusing post with funny pictures showing the things that can go wrong in our everyday lives.
Over to you
What have I missed? Am I just a total sad-sack? Is there hope yet for me? I’m not sure. Please leave me an encouraging comment below if you can.